Diary Piece – Beverly Hills Hotel
Spent the day at The Beverly Hills hotel today, Beverly Hills was named after this hotel – the hotel was there first, it is the most beautiful hotel that I have ever been to, Sharon Osborne talks heavily of it in her book and her and Ozzy can be seen there daily having tea and hair cuts….
Anyway, our guide, the lovely Wendy let us into a few secrets, the Chelsea football team have been staying there for a couple of weeks and apparently hotel management have had to keep their laundry under lock and key for fear that someone may steal their pants and flog them on eBay!
That’s not all, as we wonder through the restaurant passing Keanu Reeves sipping Fiji water, I bump into Nicole Kidman and her bloke munching on the famous Beverly Hills chop salad and then listen to tales of George Hamilton making pals with P Diddy, and “it all happened here” Wendy tells me as we sit at the best table in the house overlooking all the multi million dollar deals that I suspect are being brokered right in front of me in the epicentre of the Hollywood entertainment industry.
So I am being treated to lunch, and first off is some hors d'oevres specially made for us because “we are British”, so basically that consisted of an egg and bacon sandwich the size of a two piece piece that you pick up with two fingers and eat in one, lobster and salmon with caviar… Now I am vege so, off came the bacon and down went the egg and bread in one mouthful, now, salmon, last time I tried this I had dioreah after – it was at my Nans 70th and I was 14, of course the caviar was going nowhere near my stomach, thank you very much so I though I better eat the salmon out of courtesy! Now, for the drum role, lobster… hmm, so the bacon and caviar were left, I surely couldn’t leave this could I? I couldn’t be rude, so in my gob it went, and after 5 minutes of chewing and smiling sweetly what could I do, I was speaking with it tucked in the side of my mouth, did I excuse myself and go to the toilet and spit it out or did I tell her to look at an imaginary something behind her and quickly spit it out…. Well, I didn’t want to risk either so down it went….., yuk, never again thanks…. The rest of the meal was fine, tear drop tomato linguini (tomatoes pasta) and ice cream yum…..
It seems this place is more than just any hotel, firstly people can’t seem to leave, people really live here and why not when the bungalows are a bargain at a starting price of just $500 per night. Then the hottest parties happen here, the best history is here, and the biggest secrets happen within these grounds and never get out, they are even retaining the pool manager after he has retired for fear that when he is no longer on the payrole he will pen his memoirs of the debauched happenings of the rich and famous that he has experienced first hand.
The staff love working here, they are paid well, they walk around with big smiles, the staff air kiss each other, its like they are in heaven, in fact, I think they think they are!
I’m told that this is the place to get “discovered”, hopefully there are cheaper ways… I’m off to find them.